Pinguys #2 Guyline Tensioners for Ultralight Lines, 4 Pack

They say that necessity is the mother of invention. I disagree, but only on this detail: Irritation, in fact, is the actual origin.

Irritation in this case at one particular instance having to tie an entire two masted schooner's worth of Prusik knots in all the guylines on my hammock tarp in the dark, in the wind, in the rain. Again. Don't get me wrong; I enjoy a good knot and there are few better ways to show off the heights of your outdoor studliness to your mates at the camp site. But I'm also lazy, you see.

Surely, I concluded, there must be a better way.

Well, of course there is. The world is just chock-a-block full of little toggles, hooks, cams, cleats, and assorted widgets of varying degrees of effectiveness all claiming to be the bees own knees at removing all the effort and skill required to pull your guylines taut. My problem with these is threefold, though. First, an awful lot of them just flat out don't work. The ones that came packaged with my tarp from the factory certainly didn't, which is how we wound up in that knot-tying kerfuffle in the first place. Second is the truly audacious per unit cost of the brand name options for, at the end of the day, a dinky piece of plastic.

And the third of course is that none of them are shaped like penguins. I daresay I fixed all three problems with these.

So when the wind's getting up and the rain's coming down, don't worry! Help is at hand, because you've got some guys for that.



Pinguys are the world's premier Spheniscidae-adjacent cord and guyline tensioners. They're designed specifically around how I prefer to pitch my camping tarps and canopies, and there's a good chance they'll fit the bill for you, too.

Pinguys are light: In this #2 size, these are a mere 0.6 grams each. Yes, less than a gram!

Pinguys are strong: They're printed completely solid in tough old polycarbonate, #2 size Pinguys have a break strength of 25kg (55 lbs) and a safe working limit of 20kg (44 lbs).

Pinguys are versatile: If you insist on stringing up your tarps and tents with friggin' dental floss, the #2 Pinguys are for you. These accommodate 2mm, 1.75mm, and 1.5mm line even including slippery Dyneema arborists' throw line. If you have a fancy cottage industry ultralight tarp, this size is probably appropriate for the guylines it came with.

Pinguys are cheap: They're like a quarter of the cost per unit as my nearest big name competitor you might find at the hardware store, the one whose name rhymes with "bite flies." And they come in a cute little envelope pack I stick a stamp on and I mail 'em to you just like a postcard.

Pinguys are easy to use: I provide pictorial instructions for two simple ways to lock a line to one of these, but truth be told you can probably just wrap your cord under its wings any old how and it'll hold solid.

Pinguys are convenient: Setting up and tearing down are a snap. Doing these up and, importantly, undoing them takes like two seconds. You can even leave your Pinguys on your guylines and pack them up just as-is, so you'll never have to tie or untie another damn knot in them ever again!

But Pinguys are for tensioning lines on tarps and tents, securing cord around bundles, and holding down gear only. They're not for winching, hauling, or rappelling. They are absolutely not for supporting human weight under any circumstances whatsoever, and my lawyers tell me the phrase I should use about this is, "Otherwise serious injury or death may occur." But I say this instead: You'll go splat, and that's a really bad time!

Cordage is not included with your packet of Pinguys. You're on your own with that.



At Least Two Ways To Use

Out of probably dozens I haven't even thought of. Method 1: With your Pinguy kept in place on a single line, affix your line at one end (possibly with a loop passed through a grommet or similar) and tension the standing free end from a stake or other anchor point.



Method 2: You can tie a Pinguy to a loop, possibly of an elastic cord if you're a shock cord kind of camper, and tension a separate line that's anchored to something on the other end however you like.